Sin

Leave it to the Christians to take the fun out of being bad. They could have picked any word at all, even “Quetzalcoatl” or “spork” or “abracadabra” but instead they went with the weakest, least interesting word there ever was. No hard P’s or T’s, not even a nice randy X to stir the loins. It just dies in your mouth like someone crapped there and you’re trying to keep from swallowing the turd. You don’t even really have to finish saying it — just “sihhh…..thpppt”. Considering that the act of sinning means to make an intentional act against GOD, that is, to move in DIRECT VIOLATION of the one universal truth, you’d think this word would be

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a bigger deal. Maybe “godpunch” or “godrape” or “godkickinthesack” or “absolute cosmic clusterfucking”. Anything.

Of course this is all wrong. The word “sin” probably had nothing to do with Christianity. It traces back to Proto-Germanic, which was invented before God, so back during dinonaur times it probably meant something totally different, like “to steal Thag’s rock and clobber your cavewife with it”. Then when the Christians invaded northern Europe, and turned all the cool Pagan stuff like tree worship and witch burning into eating crackers and beating your children, they decided to keep that word to make it easier on the cave-dwelling locals. And that sounds totally ridiculous and made-up except it’s probably not that far from the truth, although I am exaggerating the evolutionary development of the Germans a bit. I think they were still tree rats at that point.

Comments 2

  1. Chrissy wrote:

    I am so happy I searched for “words I hate” and found this. Hysterical.

    Posted 19 Jun 2011 at 4:13 pm
  2. Asa wrote:

    you my boy are an ass for this post. Simply an ass.

    Posted 21 Nov 2012 at 11:01 pm

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