This is what happens when the English language attempts to appropriate a Swedish word. You get one of the most ugly and cumbersome abominations ever to exit your mouth that didn’t involve Pabst Blue Ribbon and a bottle of spray cheese.
An ombudsman (or, in even more sickeningly politically-correct parlance, ombudsperson) is someone who acts as a liaison in resolving conflict or addressing complaints, typically between an individual and larger institutional body. I first learned what an ombudsman was from Bloom County, in which Opus took a position as the ombudsman at the local newspaper, the Bloom Picayune. There, he handled complaints from old ladies offended at the newspaper’s use of words like “snugglebunnies” or whatever.
I have myself used ombudspersons twice in my life: once in college to lodge a complaint against a professor, who was harassing me, and once to lodge a complaint against my boss, who was a twat. It is a very useful position. And yet, we saddled it with this awful awful word.
I suggest replacing this word with an acronym to make it sound more “officially”. Any of these will do:
C.L. – “Complaints Liaison”
G.D.S. – “Grievance Dispersal Supervisor”
W.I.M. – “Whining Interface Moderator”
B.A. – “Bitch Abatement”
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